I'm not dead yet. I've just been very busy here in Chicago, trying to sleep in, trying to work out, finding a lab to work in, finding good places to eat out. You know, the old 'in-out in-out', just modified slightly. My pecs are killing me. Maybe this reason I can convince some more of you why there is no loving God. And maybe I'll try and present an alternate perspective, how there may be a loving God. Then again, maybe I won't.
So, my final exam. I'd spent the whole day studying for this exam, watching lectures from past semesters and thinking about how little my current professor knows. I had my Electrical Engineering final the next day, and the wonderful Professor Ross was having office hours all day long, so I decided to go at about 2, and try not to think about my computer science exam at 5 o'clock.
Everything was going pretty smoothly until people started talking about the exam that was going to take place the next day. At 12:30. But...I knew that exam was the same time at computer science...but how could that be, the cs exam is at 5...
"I thought the exam was at 5 o'clock," I said, and laughed a small laugh. The other students laughed larger laughts, and Bharath told an anecdote of his friend who slept through the first hour of his final exam, but still left early and got the highest grade in the class. "That's useful," I thought to myself, "I was going to miss the whole exam, which would have made it rather difficult to get the highest score in the entire class.
I watched people trickle in a 4 who I recognized from my computer science class. I thought it was silly that they would come right before their exam in an hour, what did they think they would get out of it?
At 4:30, nobody from CS class had left, and I thought about making some comment regarding the exam to the students still present, but decided against it. I figured they, like me, probably didn't want to bother themselves with the exam so soon before it. I was a good student for leaving so early, I was sure to make it there on time, I'd have time to sit and relax. Hopefully Jeff wouldn't show up and ask me some sort of random question and throw off my vibe.
Of course, I'd forgotten to write down the name of the room in which the exam was, so I went to look it up...and noticed that it had already ended. It was the same time as EE...12:30-3:30. It was 4:30. I had not taken the exam.
I decided to pee, because in times like this, there isn't much you can do other than just pee. So, I relaxed, as I'd been planning to do all day long, and peed, and when I returned, the exam was still from 12:30. I laughed at myself. I'd never missed an exam before in my life, at least, not without knowing I would be missing it. I laughed at myself. I'd just find where they were grading it, and convince them to let me take it. And if they don't, who cares, it's just a final exam.
I hustled over to Soda Hall, the computer science building, and ran up the stairs to see if Professor Clancy was in his office. He was not. I looked around for any sign of grading papers. There was none. I was calm. This was entertaining, you know. I was pretty sure that Clancy would let me make it up. And if not, well, I could retake it with Professors who don't suck, and learn the material far better than I did this semester, although I didn't really doubt my understanding.
I saw Dan Garcia, who taught me for my first two computer science classes, packing up stuff, getting ready to go. I'd never gotten a chance to thank him for writing me the letter of recommendation for this Chicago program, even if it did arrive late. Then I mentioned my little problem, and he looked at me like I was a leper with SARS and a pencil sticking out of my eye. And told me to find Clancy, now.
I went back to his office, he was not there. I went downstairs, hoping that grading might be taking place. He was not there. I enquired, thinking that perhaps someone at the CSUA would know. The guy there looked at me like I was a leper with SARS and a pencil sticking out of my eye. But he wanted to help me, becuase he was kind. He told me to look in every room, every floor. But Clancy was not there. I was starting to get a little nervous. If I miss the final, I get a C in the class. I won't get into honors EECS. I'll never get into a good grad school.
Ah, who cares? It was kind of liberating to be solving this particular problem of finding a professor rather than sitting in a room taking an exam. It wasn't nerve racking, I knew the right course of action to take. Or so I thought.
I went downstairs, and sent Clancy an e-mail. I left a note on his door. I called his phone. I looked in more rooms. I called his phone. I looked in more rooms. I found my buddy Xylar, who upon hearing my situation, looked at me like a leper with SARS and a pencil sticking out of my eye. But it wasn't such a big deal. I could handle it. He told me to find the professor. Yup.
Eventually, I decided to check the Davis labs, thinking he might be in there for self-paced stuff. I didn't see him, but thought he might be elsewhere in the building. As I walked down the hall, I noticed Sam, my TA across the hall in another Davis lab. I looked closer, and saw that the grading was in process.
I stumbled into the room, and took a deep breath.
"Hi Professor Clancy," I paused, gathering my energy to told him I missed the exam.
"Oh, where were you?" he asked calmly, like I was no leper with no SARS and no protruding pencil.
"I thought the exam was at 5."
"Oh, OK." He grabbed an exam, and led me into a room. I was calm, cool, collected, happy that I would get a C if I got 0 points, that every ten points I get, my grade goes up by a +. This was good, the perfect way to allay my fears of doing poorly on the exam - that I wouldn't be able to take the exam at all.
So I took the exam, relaxedly, sans cheating (as always).
And I did horribly. And now I care, because this would have been the semester of the 4.0 if I had aced that exam. But while taking it, there were no worries at all - it was like the exam was all bonus points.
So even though I may not get into EECS honors, I can now put something on my resume that's absolutely true:
Works calmly and efficiently in a crisis situation. (Please refer to supplement B.4, "How to miss a final exam and still get a 3.9")
